Simply, I'm a completely broken person. I've made some choices that led me down a path far from God. For a while I was doing things that basically nullified what Jesus did on the cross for me, saying that I could take care of myself and everything and I didn't need Him.
The thing is, He was furiously, relentlessly pursuing me. He let me step over boundaries and test the limits, but He knew how much I could take and He wouldn't let me step over that line, praise God! Almost 3 years ago, the Holy Spirit really did a work in my heart and I started taking steps in the right direction. I've been a christian since I was about 6 years old, but it was never my own faith; it was what I was taught. The past 3 years has been God guiding my heart more and more towards Himself and showing me how much He loves me, how much He gave for me. He healed the hurting parts of my heart bit by bit as I gave them up to Him. Even when I would take things back from Him, He kept asking to carry them, to take my burden on His shoulders.
That's what it is to give your life to Christ; to see your broken state and know that in your humanity you can't save yourself, you're lost. Christ took your burden, your sin, your brokenness, your fallen nature, He took it on His shoulders and died with it. Then the power of God raised Him from the dead so that He could raise us up too! When we come to Jesus, we die and are given a new spirit. We are a new person!
God created us to worship Him. Part of that is recognizing what Christ did for us and the power there is in His death and resurrection. Recognizing that the Father loves so unconditionally that He had to have a way to destroy the disconnect sin created, and so He sent His Son to take all that on Him and create a way back to the Father. How crazy is that?? He wants us to live our lives in worship, in His presence, in a way where we are in constant communion with Him. That's what He created us for. This constant communion means no hurt, no pain, no suffering. I don't mean that life will be easy and carefree, but that we can cast our hurts, pains and suffering on Him and in His presence and love find peace and joy to walk in. He is so faithful, He will never fail to invade our lives with peace and joy. Too often we look to the world to take our pain away and that will never work, ever. But with God, He promises to never leave us.
I definitely don't have all this down pat. Some days go by and at the end I realize I've barely talked to God all day while other days it's constant communion with God. But no matter how much I stray away or mess up, God is always there waiting for me. He initiates, He comes to us. He will never fail us. It's getting easier and easier to just find myself in His presence all the time and it's such a joy to recognize that and see His hand in my everyday life! It's crazy.
So this is ending up long. There's this sweet song I heard a while ago and heard it again tonight and it's sooo good! Speaks to my heart, I pray it speaks to yours too. Be blessed!
God is soo good. Another sweet as song came to mind and I have to post that too. The bridge speaks so strongly to my heart every single time. God is SO good!
'I may be weak, but Your Spirit's strong in me. My flesh may fail, my God You never will.'
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